Blah Games

Star Flush 64

About the game and our heroes.

From the maker of Constipator comes this new 3D shooter that just dropped. And it's no splash in the pan. You play as fighter pilot Flush McClog, a fox who has a human named John for a father and a forest creature called a Rhinostitute for a mother. Joining you on your journey are Slippy Toad (pilot of the Toad Stool), Falco Loobirdo, and Peppy Bare. You will also receive help from a robot helper called Peril Locator on Patrol #64, or PLOP64. Another fighter pilot, Brewster, has been yearning to come out of retirement to join the cause. He pilots the Pigeon Bomber, and he specializes in taking out enemy vehicles and statues of the villains. Unfortunately, your commander General Pepper has consumed an excessive amount of spicy foods and will have to sit out this mission. Instead, you'll be taking orders from General Colon Bowels. He will provide assistance and assurance, as well as assembling an association of assigned assassins.

Know your enemy, inside and out.

Andross Handwash was born and raised on Cornholia, and grew to be a brilliant proctologist. His OCD and attention to detail made him a rising star in a homeland that needed him badly. But things headed south when his planet got swallowed into a black hole. He barely escaped, and the loss of his world filled him with rage that he could never put behind him. Leaking with anger (and flammable gasses), he led a revolution that took him in circles for a while, but eventually ended up with him becoming leader of the Yuri Nation. His forces have been probing planets all over the universe. But things are getting worse. He just invaded Uranus, and it's your job to rectify the situation. Stop him from dumping waste all over the planet and knock him off his throne. He's bound to be pissed off, so watch out for his streaming attacks and plunger missiles. The planet's full moon has filthy mounds of WMDs amongst a desert landscape. Use "the force" to push out strong yellow lasers to zap them away. His base may look impenetrable, but you just have to aim for the open valve. Wipe out all of Andross' forces to cleanse the universe of his dark energy once and for all.

And you'll get a cake!*

At a retail price of $90.09, this game may drain your wallet, but you'll be playing it all night long! It's already the #2 game in Flushing, New York!

*Urinal cake.

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